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How Hungry Are You...

Hunger always wins.

One of the most challenging aspects of being a human is resisting the temptations of that favorite snack.

We are forced into fighting and resisting these temptations every time we walk into a grocery store and stand in line to pay. The candy bars are watching you! Hoping you give in and grab one or maybe two when they are on a 2 for 1 deal!

Most of the time we can resist. We look away, we focus on the items being scanned, we chat with the store employee, etc.

Then, there are those moments that we just can’t say “no.” We end up grabbing a couple items that we feel we need - candy bar or two, Ice cream, cookies, chips, etc.

How does that happen? Why can we resist the urge on several occasions but give in at other times. It feels random and unpredictable.

Maybe it’s not!

Hunger always wins and will drive our behavior when there is a scarcity in our life.

This phenomenon extends beyond the challenges at the checkout line and manifests as much or more in our self, our relationships, and how we navigate the world around us.

When we have scarcity, a lack of something, our nervous system dials up and starts to sound the alarm.

Our entire system dials up vigilance, awareness, and focus towards whatever we need to satisfy the scarcity. It doesn’t matter if it’s a “real” need or “perceived” want.

Once we decide something is scarce, all systems go and our effort becomes focused on satisfying that need or want.

Examples may include..

  • Anxious from lack of information where your partner was last night? Scarcity of information..
  • Low energy and fatigue from working 12 hour days. Scarcity of sleep…
  • Increasing emotional dysregulation due to your roommate leaving dishes in the sink. Scarcity of support…
  • Depressed due to withdrawal from your partner. Scarcity of connection..
  • Avoiding that friend that keeps calling and wants to get together. Scarcity of boundaries…

When we are experiencing scarcity it feels impossible to escape thinking about it. We try to fix it by talking about it, scrolling the internet about it, or finding other reasons why it may be happening. We also try to distract ourselves through various methods, healthy and unhealthy, but ultimately it won’t go away.

Hunger always wins.

Therefore, when you find yourself vigilant, focused, and seemingly exhausted thinking or behaving in a way that is bewildering to you.

Take a pause, step back from the situation or subject and reflect on what might be scarce?

What is missing that could be provided and ultimately satisfy your hunger?

Is it related to..

  • Being seen
  • Feeling connected
  • Receiving support
  • Feeling believed
  • Seeking novelty
  • Feeling heard

Everyone has different needs and wants. Which means scarcity will develop when there is an abundance of distractions and other factors that lead us away from our self attunement.

The challenges and obstacles we navigate every day offer ample opportunity to create hunger from within us.

If we don’t pay attention and get lost in the abundance of life then our nervous system will inevitably dial up and remind us something is missing.

Hunger always wins….